Safe From the Zombie Apocalypse*

 

no blinkin' lincoln

"I have a spine made of titanium" - Michele Bachmann

And just as flexible. That trumps Obama's spine of steel. 

. I guess that's to square the circle and resolve the perceived conflict between being as a good Christian woman subservient to her husband and being her own woman as commander in chief. Alex Wagner on the Mr Irritating Potato Head show thought the Newsweek cover shot unfairly showed her as "blank and confused". In other words her natural state. If her handlers can get her to stop confusing her mascara with Super Glue she may have a shot at the nomination. No wonder she gets migraines.  She does have a Palinesque appeal to the legion of Republican dumbasses who aren't rich. That's what the bell curve does for you. Since stupid worked back in 2000 and 2004 I guess the conservative powers that be have decided for laughs to change it up and go with crazy:

  "But we also know that the very founders that wrote those documents worked tirelessly until slavery was no more in the United States."

Like them guys in the Bible that lived to be 150 years old. And that whole 3/5ths thing in the Constitution? That was just a fakeout.


*no brain to eat - I know - it's not a joke if you have to explain it.  So fuck you.