Friday, June 15, 2012

The World's Worst Catholic™ Backs the Nuns



That's all they need. It's a close call. I could go either way. Sister Mary Joseph scared the shit out of me (literally) in first grade and that other one tore up my copy of Mad magazine in Catechism class. Apparently Mad magazine was the Devil's work. Who knew? And she was one of the nice ones. But nothing pisses off the Pope more than Catholics who act like Christians and since this particular one spent some of his formative years trying to shoot down my dad, I'm gonna have to side with today's modern a-go-go sisters. Although Papa Bene may have a point. Feeding the poor and healing the sick ain't gonna put starch in those robes and a point on that hat. What are we - Mennonites? Much better to cosey up to these clowns. Vatican II - who needs it? Let's save the excommunicating for nuns who save women's lives.

Wednesday, June 06, 2012

Mitt Romney - He's Not Helping


I mean he was like this big 
“I met a guy yesterday who is 7 feet tall, tall, handsome, great big guy, 7 feet tall, name is Rick Miller, Portland, Oregon,” Romney began the newest story. “He started a business, of course, you know it was in basketball, but it wasn’t in basketball, I mean I figured he had to be in sport, but he wasn’t in sport, his business is caring for seniors, senior centers and nursing homes and other types of care facilities.”

Mitt continues to connect with his audience -"I meet another guy who was 500 lbs, fat as a walrus. He started a business, of course, you knew it had to be a bakery, but it wasn't a bakery. I mean I figured he had to be in foods, but he wasn't in foods, his business was as a personal trainer."