All these years have got me to reflecting:
Things I am sorry about:
1. Shooting you in the chin with an arrow.
2. Hitting you in the head with rocks (all occasions)
3.Talking you into taking your tricycle down Dead Man's Hill
4. Not talking you out of wearing those plaid pants in high school or combing your hair like Michael Caine on crack
1. Setting the bar so low that you could shuffle over it on your life's journey.
2. Teaching you a valuable lesson: Don't ever, ever, ever listen to anything I tell you.
I do not regret jacking your jaw and launching you into the skittles table at the Otesaga Inn. If it did count, it shouldn't have. You had it coming and don't pretend you didn't.