Thursday, January 05, 2012

God Hates Indians


There, I said it. Otherwise why would he kill them all off so we Americans could have a country where we can live free and bring our slaves with us? Now God wants Rick Santorum to be President. A few months ago it was Michelle Bachmann but she was too rabid-rat crazy even for God. Then Herman Caine until God tried the pizza. Then Rick Perry who threw a nice party for God and was tall, Texan and nicely coiffed. Just like God likes 'em. But God forgot to hook up the mouth/brain circuit on Texas Rick so he moved on to Newt, who pissed off God by claiming to be the smartest being in the universe. Now Rick Santorum is God's rep on earth, brought forth to make sure that women are free not to have abortions and gays are free not get married. God's all about the freedom. Rick will be the guy until God figures out how to work the Google. God can't seem to make up his mind. By process of elimination (which has been God's modus operandi for all time - if I weren't a religious person I would almost think that God doesn't care and just lets shit happen) it looks like God will settle for the Mormon guy. At least until he finds out about the whole ruling your own planet and becoming a god thing. That won't go over too well so the Muslim socialist wins again.

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